When people try to lose weight they usually keep a before picture to look at along the journey to compare the “then” and “now”. Depression is a WHOLE lot of emotional weight, and it hit me that people trying to lose this weight also need something to serve as a “before picture”. Something to remind them of why they are fighting, and to give them a point of reference and show how far they’ve come. Today I got my “before pic” in the form of a song.
One of my favorite musical artists is Owl City. That may sound strange or juvenile, but his ability to create such whimsical imagery in music that has deep meaning makes him a great artist in my mind. One of his songs Silhouette was one of my “go-to” relateable songs back when I was at my lower points. Today I heard the song playing. I listened closely as it played, but something was missing. As though I had just spoken with an old friend I didn’t know anymore; our connection removed. My connection to the sadness and loneliness portrayed in Silhouette was no more. That’s I realized how far God has brought me from that place of feeling so alone, and hollow. Don’t get me wrong, I still love the song. It’s a beautiful, powerful song that shares how it feels to be in such a state both mentally and emotionally. Yet, I no longer ask myself “Will ever feel/smile/love again?” I don’t suffer from night terrors and wake up in tears (or screaming since that was more my style) I am full of hope, peace, and joy. The grace of God has dumped down on me to wash away the anxieties, fears, emptiness and self-hatred.
Sometimes we don’t see how far we’ve come because we live with ourselves every day. Finding a “before picture” to compare your current state to makes all the difference. I hope you find your own “picture” this week and are able to see how far God has brought in your journey.