My philosophy about personal identity is this; we are our truest selves when we are children and have not yet been changed by the influences that surround us.
There are influences around us molding how we speak, act, dress, and work. How do we find our true nature again after the nurture? Baby stories! Yeah it sounds weird like that, but people who knew you as a small child help a lot. They’re eye witnesses to your personality and skill set as a child. Such people have helped mark a path for my journey towards liberation from a molded personality. It began over a year ago and it’s been a difficult journey. Embracing who you are, weeding out negative traits… it’s hard. But it is so worth it.
However, learning to “be” me and “do” me aren’t the same thing. At first I was blind to it. Hustling along everyday everything seemed fine, then bronchitis came along and kicked me down, which gave me some time to think. All of a sudden everything was far from okay and I felt destined for failure. Thinking it over I realized while finding my personality (being me) has been a focus, my natural skill set (doing me) has gone mostly ignored. I’ve even brain stormed out the start up of business that I don’t really want to run! It turns out this blog is the only thing that currently feels right. Even though it’s still far from perfect.
I’ve been like a bird trying to dig tunnels when I was made to fly. It has caused me so much grief trying to be skilled in something I wasn’t made for! How will you ever feel confident in who you are living as something you aren’t? Hint: You won’t.
Please learn from my mistakes. Take time to think and pray about who you are. Remove your makes so it’s your face that shows. God made you to be you. I can’t yet drop everything and take up those things I love yet, but I CAN slowly add them into my life and hope that one day God allows me to be/do me for Him.