These past few weeks, saying no and taking rain-checks has been a bit of a trend. Granted it has been partially due to illness, but guys, it’s become clear that sadly it is also an error on my part. As an introvert I LOVE spending time with people one-on-one rather than in groups. However, I’ve been trying to be a friend to more people, while adding to my work schedule, and also planning according to their busy schedules. Simply put, I’ve been trying to spend time with a lot of people, without having a lot of time. This leads to letting people down.
Letting people down is one of the worst feelings, isn’t it? Even if the plans you have aren’t actually set plans, but you made plans with one friend when you could have executed plans with someone you forgot you’d been talking about hanging out with…it feels lousy. This being said, throwing in the towel and accepting yourself as just a bad friend shouldn’t be an option. I’m starting to understand, and hopefully this will help you too, sometimes you just don’t have the time to hang out with 10 people individually during 1 season of your life, and this doesn’t mean aren’t being a good friend. Right now I’m evaluating my own situation trying to think of ways to remedy this error in time management. Here are some current thoughts I’ve got to help overcome the issue of forgetting/flaking out on plans.
This is a list I’ve made for myself, but feel free to use it if this is your struggle too.
- DON’T Make or Break it – Don’t make uncertain plans with people. When you make a plan, set an actual date and time to it. (Pick a date that isn’t already full!)
- DO Look Beyond the Moment -Do make plans in advance whenever possible. Note them in your calendar or phone to avoid double booking.
- DO Double Up – Do make plans that include multiple (mutual) friends sometimes. This way nobody is neglected, and you all get to enjoy time together.
That’s all I’ve got so far. Feel free to comment any more suggestions